Imagine this: you’re in a new relationship, and just might have found that elusive partner you have been searching for. Congratulations! The stars have aligned and, as it turns out, those rom-com’s have been right this whole time: love really is all around.
Then, seemingly out of nowhere, the disagreements about money begin. Think I’m wrong? Consider your own situation. Do you notice how much your partner spends on their hobbies? Are they shelling out a few hundred dollars each year for “incredibly important” activities like fantasy football leagues and office golf tournaments? Perhaps your partner is easily enticed by promotional advertisements and finds themselves rationalizing their excessive spending because, sure they spent $500, but they “saved so much, can you believe it?!”.
Believe it or not, money is one of the biggest reasons for disagreements for couples and can, in some cases, lead to troubles within a marriage and/or a serious relationship. The good news? These troubles can largely be prevented!
So what can you do to ensure money issues rarely come between you and your partner?
1. Communicate, communicate, communicate!
Open, honest communication is one of the most critical aspects of any relationship, so it follows that having frequent conversations about your financial health as a couple is of utmost importance.
Do either of you carry significant personal debt? Do your spending habits need to be revisited? How are you currently dividing up financial responsibilities?
The list of topics to cover with one another is exhaustive, but the conversation does not have to be. I suggest scheduling a date night to sit down together to review your finances. You can’t possibly be on the same page, or remain on the same page, if you’re both reading different books.
2. Discuss Your Financial Backgrounds
You obviously know your partner’s taste in movies, tv, food, etc., but do you happen to know how they feel about their money? Some see money as the root of all evil, while others picture money as the necessary means to achieve their desired ends. There is not one “right” answer, but it is important to understand how your partner feels, and how they arrived at their conclusion. Every one has a different financial background and largely bases their current decisions as a result of what they were exposed to throughout their childhoods through their upbringing. Perhaps you were raised to save every last dollar but your partner, on the other hand, spends freely without much thought. Having different financial backgrounds is not altogether uncommon. If your money beliefs differ from your partner’s, find out why. Developing a firm understanding of one another and your experiences will help you become more stable as a couple financially and, likely, make you a stronger team personally.
3. Plan Together
The next time the two of you discuss your financial futures and your plans for eventual retirement, do so together. Take the time to establish thoughtful, specific, measurable goals with your partner. What do the two of you want to do with your lives together? Perhaps a dream of yours is to take a sabbatical at some point during your career and travel the world. Maybe your partner is hoping to go back to school later on, or is even interested in forming their own company some day. It is exciting to dream, but it is even more exciting to live out those dreams, provided you’ve laid the necessary foundation for achieving them.
The next time you and your partner find yourselves imagining the possibilities your future might hold, get out a pen and paper and actually document your goals. Set aside time to build a budget together to carve out ways you can forge ahead. Consider hiring a financial professional to guide you in the creation of a budget, help you implement a strategic savings plan, and assist you in managing your investments so that you can ultimately afford the life you’re so vividly picturing.
Leave a Reply